Pick one answer
A summary of this lesson to come back to. To make it stick, work through the steps above.
Write down one reaction where you expect to be rejected, and turn it into one small act of still making eye contact or smiling.
As a kid you heard "your smile looks weird" or "why are you so fat?" You couldn't argue back then, so you believed it. You've grown up, and your looks and life have changed, but the line stayed with you. Now you hold back your smile and avoid eye contact.
If you expect to be judged, you hide first: no smiling, no eye contact, joking at your own expense before anyone else can. She sees someone cold and evasive, so she warms up less, and the old belief gets "proven" one more time.
You don't rewrite an old assumption by convincing yourself you're handsome. You do one small thing that goes against it, so your body collects new experience. One held glance, one smile you don't take back. Each is new evidence.
This week, in one conversation, try one small action on purpose: hold eye contact for two extra seconds, or laugh out loud when the other person laughs.